User blog comment:Fimber/When family is what destroys you/@comment-67.239.100.57-20121123082221

Sorry, but I can't disagree more.? I? haven't read through all the comments below as it would take more time than I have. I will just give my opinion in as few words as possible.

What you call? the "family is what destroys you" is a theme than runs through stories and literature for hundreds, even thousands of years and is not something unusual. And yes, even stories ment for and enjoyed by children, as either a main theme or device, or just touched upon. Stories from Cinderella (there are hundreds of versions) to Hansel and Gretel, to Harry Potter, and these are just some that come quickly to mind. Legends, myths, fairy tales, poetry, and novels from every generation, from ancient to modern times have families that are not models to admire. In these stories fathers, mothers, sons, daughters, brothers, sisters, uncles etc. fight, torture, murder, and manipulate their family. It's not pretty and on the surface this does not seem to be something you would want your whole family to? look to? for entertainment. But within these stories are great treasures and tales that inspire,? that teach virtues such as: bravery, loyalty, love, friendship, forgiveness, and self-sacrifice. And I believe the show "Merlin" fits into this same category.

Morgana’s character is clearly in the wrong. If anything, this show demonstrates the destructive nature of revenge and hatred that even destroys the one who does it. The path that Morgana follows is clearly the wrong one and I don’t think any child will come away thinking that Morgana is someone you would want to be like. Morgana has even destroyed herself. We don’t need to be told that what Morgana does is wrong; that’s shown clearly through the medium of the story. At the same time we are able to empathize with Morgana’s character since we have seen her change from the brave and kind young woman to what she is now because of the choices she has made. ? Also, we have seen her point of view which lets us see where she is coming from.

How about Arthur?

It was Merlin who said that what Ygraine’s ghost said was a lie; she was telling the truth about magic being used for Arthur’s birth. ? Whether Uther was warned that a life had to be taken is unknown. Knowing Uther, he could have been told and didn’t listen, as usual; that would be perfectly in character.

Arthur trying to kill his father was not shown to be a good thing. Merlin even lied about magic to keep Arthur from doing it because, as Merlin said'', it would destroy him. ''How clear is that?

“No matter how often Uther told Arthur that he was proud of him and that he loved him, Arthur always struggled for his father's love and acceptance, ignoring that he has had it all along. No matter how often Uther wanted to sacrifice himself for his son, Arthur still believed for some incomprehensible reason that his father disapproved of him.” ? First of all, Uther was a hard man to get along with; even your average family has that problem at times. Second of all, as time went on, as Arthur matured, many of the things he did, stood for, and believed are what his father would never have approved of. And thank goodness. Uther would have been disappointed and even furious at him for many of the things he did, so Arthur hid much of himself, his true self, from his father. Uther didn’t know much of what his son did and stood for, and so never had a reason to doubt him. But like I said, thank goodness Arthur went against his father’s unjust and unreasonable teachings; he followed his conscience instead and is a much better man for it. There comes a time in everyone’s life where they must make up their own mind and are not influenced unduly by what their parents believe. If what their parents do and believe is wrong, it doesn’t mean the children don’t love or respect them any less.

“Later, Arthur saw his almost-wife Gwen kissing another man and banned her from Camelot in rage, even threatened her to kill her if she ever returns.” What else would anyone do in this situation? This is just realistic.

“The Death Song of Uther Pendragon”, despite what some say, I think it is in line with Uther’s character. When it was announced that Uther was coming back this season, I was talking with friends and we all agreed that Uther would not be happy with Arthur. ? But we did think that death might have opened his eyes and he would see things differently than he did before. But no, he was just the same as he was when in full health.

It’s not a “ridiculous fact that his own father thought of him as a failure”. I think it’s only too typical of Uther. Like I said above, Arthur hid much of his doings and beliefs from his father, so Uther presumed Arthur would follow his teachings and was proud of his son. Do you think Uther would have been proud of his son during life if he knew Arthur “bargained with a sorcerer” in “The Labyrinth of Gedref”? That he saved Mordred because he was an innocent child? That he helped his peasant, servant friend protect his village in “The Moment of Truth”? That he went to save Gwen from Hengist and fell in love with her? That he went to save Elyan from Cenred? No, Uther would have never approved of so much Arthur did and stood for and would have never stood for or tolerated it while he was alive. Why would he do so after death? If he would have known of these things while he was alive, he would have given his “you’re not ready to be king, you don’t understand what it takes to be king” speech and would have surely punished Arthur.

Uther trying to kill Gwen? He’s slaughtered hundreds of innocents before, what is so different about this? That she’s Arthur’s wife and he loves her? Arthur admitted his love for Gwen during Uther’s life and what does he do? He exiled her. He didn’t even take into account how this would affect Arthur and try to talk to him about it. Even with beliefs about political marriages, any parent who actually cared enough about their child would take more care in this situation.

So, no, Uther didn’t care for Arthur enough; in life or in death. The Arthur he was proud of, the son he believed would follow his teachings and example, and carry out his legacy didn’t exist. ? Yes, Uther loved his son, but not enough; he loved his pride more. He would have felt betrayed while alive if he had known and after death he felt the same. To Uther, Arthur was a traitor to him, all he taught, the kingdom and his legacy.

“When Arthur sent Uther back to the Spirit World, he made clear that his father is now superfluous and unimportant because it's Arthur's turn now.” Even if Uther was a friendly ghost, he didn’t belong in the land of the living, but Uther was causing havoc everywhere. And Arthur was right, the kingdom was his responsibility now and he must rule according to what is right, not how daddy tells him to and against his conscience.

“The strong bond between father and son was destroyed forever.” ? That bond wasn’t as strong as you make it out to be. Too many of their end goals, beliefs, and fundamental qualities were too opposed.

“Characters are being tortured and killed, betrayed and lied to, family members destroy each other and are not to be trusted, instead friends are being shown as the ones who can be trusted, yet even those friends betray, lie and manipulate.”

Characters being tortured, killed, lied to, and betrayed are not shown to be good things! The show is not glorifying this! You see the destruction, the pain, and the evil of all this, so what is the problem? If anything, this show gives a great moral lesson. But I think it’s obvious. We don’t need someone saying: this behavior is bad, this is not good or normal, this is destructive or evil; we get to see that through the story that is being told.

“While we see the "heroes" supposedly doing the right things, we are bombarded with the very questionable message that abandoning people, that not caring for other people's well-being, that killing, revenge, cruelty, indifference and hate even towards family members is the "right" thing, simply because it's the "heroes" that do such things.”

That is such a loaded statement I can’t even begin to answer it. But in “Merlin” the heroes usually do what is right and if they don’t the results are not good. But then the heroes have their faults that make them believable and lovable at the same time. I don’t see how anyone can say this show encourages bad behavior or morals.

From the comments section: ? "' Merlin' is pretty open with showing emotional torture as well as physical torture and when such things appear, it should be dealt with within the episode, meaning, the characters should talk about it, mention it, criticise it and put it into perspective so that the viewer is not left alone with the cruelty they have just seen. "

Like I said, we don’t need to be told this, that’s shown clearly through the medium of the story. We don’t need someone saying: this behavior is bad, this is good. This is not like an Aesop fable where the lesson is spelled out at the end; the “lesson” is woven in the fabric of the story itself. No one in the family will walk away from the show thinking how torture is a good thing!

From the comments section: ? “Merlin's coldness towards Uther in The Wicked Day should have been criticized by someone within the show to state out that it's always wrong to just sit and watch someone die only because it serves your own purpose.”

I don’t understand this one at all. I understood from Gaius in this episode that Uther’s death was only a matter of time. Even when Merlin agreed to heal him, he had no idea he could save Uther for sure. It was only when Arthur suggested magic that Merlin decided to try anyway.

“Merlin… acted cowardly by that when letting others do the dirty work - it was the Gleeman who attacked Uther and Merlin didn't have to act himself. So it was a good opportunity for him to finally get rid of Uther”. ? Huh?

From the comments section: "When Arthur killed Caerleon, even though we know that such things happened in those times, it should have been dealt with more critically to show the youth that king or not, killing someone in cold blood is not right, no matter how cute the king looks and no matter how hot he is and no matter how much he and Merlin are having fun together."

This absolutely makes no sense. Sorry. It WAS shown that killing Caerleon was wrong. First, Merlin advised against it, I think he even used the words “killing in cold blood”. Second, Agravaine advised it in order to harm Arthur and Camelot. And most telling of all, the “lesson” was the war that Arthur caused by his actions. Not a good result of what he did. Arthur wasn’t a hero at the end of this episode because of “how cute he looks” or “how hot he is” or because of “how much fun he and Merlin are having”. He was a hero because he learnt from his mistake and tried to fix it. He was a hero because he put his own life on the line rather than have others die for his sin.

Anyway in case you haven't figured it out(!), I can't agree with you about the show. I think it is? great for families. Maybe very young children will be disturbed by the last couple seasons, but that could also be the case with the first couple as well. But there is no way this show teaches bad values. It is a story that teaches the value of friendship, loyalty, self-sacrifice and condemns revenge, hatred, and selfishness.

Oh my gosh. Did I just write all this? I can't believe I wrote all this! Way too long! You should be proud you were able to rile me up so much!